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I was reading about Rep. Sean Duffy from Wisconsin complaing about his $174,000 yearly salary and I was incensed! Seriously I was livid… I just about punched my computer screen. I mean how in the world can they expect a family to live on that little money!
The last time I tried to live on less than 500k a year was before CrapCo went public and we started selling stock.
In reviewing the story it became apparent what the real problem was. This guy was a freshman congressman. He had apparently not been to all of the congressional orientation groups that explain how you go about increasing your income dramatically by directly addressing the concerns of your more affluent constituents or their contracted agents (lobbyists). What was referred to in the old days as “taking a bribe”.
However there are perks like junkets, and tax shelters and untracable PAC contributions that can add another 300-400 percent to a congressional salary.
The other Republicans won’t tell him about it he should talk to Charlie Wrangle.
Business as Usual
I’m back after a short hiatus of a year and a half. No I wasn’t in prison for tax fraud (again) I was just laying low, waiting to see which way the wind was blowing.
After our new president Barak Obama the Kenyan Socialist was elected I thought there might be some danger in all that talk of “sweeping changes” and “restoring faith in government”. I was actually worried that the american people might open their eyes and see how badly major corporations and the entitled elite in this county have been screwing them and possibly rise up in revolt. If they had a leader to rally them who wanted to empower the american worker and address the inequities inherent in the system of dollar democracy we have in this country (One dollar, one vote), I was worried that it might actually be a dangerous place for a corporate mogul like me to be.
Boy was I ever wrong!
CEO Jeffery Immelt explains to the President how you can always squeeze more money out of a defective tax system
I sneak back into the country to pick up a couple of suitcases of money and what do I see in the paper? The president has appointed a corporate exec to the President’s Council on Jobs and Competitiveness, essentially asking OUR advice on how to ruin, sorry, run the economy. CEO of General Electric, Jeffrey Immelt the new appointee is most definitely an expert on the subject. He created over 900 jobs just on in the GE tax avoidance department alone and that was money well invested.
In 2007, GE paid $4.2 billion in taxes for a 15.1 percent tax rate and while the corporate tax rate in the U.S. is supposed to be 35 percent we all know that is way too high and actually only a suggestion. 15% is an outrageous amount and Immelt decided his corporate bonuses would not be enough if that continued.
Enter the (no tax) attorneys. In 2008,GE paid $1.1 billion in taxes for a 5.3 percent tax rate. However in 2009 they effectively had a negative tax rate, thanks to the $498 million loss it booked on U.S. operations versus the $10.8 billion in earnings it booked abroad. GE realized a $1.1 billion tax benefit in 2009.
By comparison, during those three years — 2007 through 2009 — the firm reported combined net income of $50.6 billion.
The most important number however is the 15.2 million Immelt earned from his salary, bonuses and stock options in 2010.
The man OBVIOUSLY knows how to create high paying jobs.
From the CEO
I wanted to personally apologize to all of our thousands of visitors and customers who have been unable to access our website recently.
Apparently while I was on hiatus in Florida (and by the way the accomodations at the federal facilities there were excellent) apparently someone launched a “point of service” attack on the CrapCo website. Who would do this you ask? A disgrutled employee… a jealous competitor… it’s hard to say. You don’t become an icon of corporate america without stabbing quite a few people in the back.
Apparently the attack involved seeding our sebsite with a lot of little “” characters that seem to multiply and wander around the site aimlessly. ( If you see any we missed during the clean up don’t feed them.) However the site is up and running again and we have take some precautions to make sure that if this happens again we will be able to replace any lost files quickly and completely.
Speaking of which… apparently during the attack some of our financial records were lost as well. Notably all of our records of payments we have made to our providers and suppliers over the past year are gone. Consequently we are assuming we are even and don’t owe anyone anything.
If you are a supplier or provider and believe we actaully do owe you money please contact our representatives at the law offices of Lye, Fallbak and Pundt.
A.I.G. issues Corporate Fraud Insurance
In an effort to prove that they are not about to roll over and play dead, an A.I.G. spokesman issued a statement yesterday to announce the release of a new type of insurance policy.
The embattled corporate giant insures everything from individual clients life and health to liability and casualty insurance for multi-million dollar movies and other high profile projects. Now they will be able to insure other corporations against the same type of corporate malfeasance that has put them in the public eye (and public gunsights) recently.
While the details of the new policy such as cost and extents of coverge have yet to be revealed it was annouced that to encourage sales in order to build up cash reserves for corporate junkets and executive pay increases, there would be huge bonuses available to the agents and brokers who sold the most policies.
Win BIG in the Bailout!
It should be obvious to anyone who reads the paper (remember paper?) that the US government is giving away large sums of money to any major corporation who asks. We want to know why not CrapCo!
No… that’s not it… why not the little guy… the individual citizen… each and everyone of us. Yeah… that’s it! So to that end we present the U.S Government Bailout Machine*
* Gambling on the Bailout Machine is not meant to be a substitute for actual financial planning. All payouts subject to the finanacial solvency of the U.S. Government. Void where prohibited by law.
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